S.P.C. A. – the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Athletes
In light of the recent firing of Rutgers’ basketball coach Mike Rice for treating his players like a Marine Drill Sergeant would treat his recruits instead of treating them like the prima donnas that they are, “The Crusty Conservative” today is encouraging the immediate establishment of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Athletes (S.P.C. A.) to protect student athletes.
“The Crusty Conservative” suggests that the proposed S.P.C. A. would be a national organization with chapters on every college campus in the country. It would be dedicated to insuring that college athletes are treated as prima donnas rather than as mature men and women who are playing tough, highly competitive sports in which baiting of opponents, foul language, and physical contact are everyday occurrences.
Local chapters of the Society For The Prevention of Cruelty To Athletes would monitor and video tape all college sporting events including practices for the use of cruel language, back slapping, “in your face” lectures or any other actions by coaches that could be deemed rude, offensive or not gentlemanly. These video tapes would be regularly reviewed by a panel of art students and student poets who would have the power to discipline coaches for any conduct that they determine would be injurious to the mental or physical health of any player.
“ In light of the past rants and chair throwing incidents by former Indiana Coach Bobby Knight and Mike Rice’s recent cruel behavior towards his players, the establishment of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Athletes (S.P.C.A.) is not only necessary but long overdue” according to “The Crusty Conservative”. “Animals are not the only ones subjected to cruelty and abuse, athletes likewise are subjected to the same and deserve the same protection as animals” he added.
“The Crusty Conservative”
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